Masks

Halloween…
A time of costumes and masks-
Painted or paper: a disguise.
The question: Who will I be?
No thought of permanence.
Trick or treat: temporary sweet living-
reality/return is not far away.
Identity changes annually. Scripts.

I am a child…
a landscape of play,
lilac trees and connections
with friends and family.

Mask making happened early.
Family moves and expectations:
I am feeling powerless, but I can do it!
Masking my feelings and desires,
I calm the surface. Follow the rules.
Ceded control!Controlled my responses!
Maintained some distance from the world.
Somehow,I find work within that framework.

Mask wearing has been my way
of being in the world.
What can I do for you?
Work! Composing a life:
the paved road of good works,
filtered experiences, acceptance, limiting stories.
Confined creativity;the light of adventure beckons.
Scripts and guises prevail- there are rewards.
Where do I belong? Beyond veneers.

Masquerade: my biggest life role.
Kaleidoscopic personas
framed a self acceptable to all.
Along the spiraled patterned path:
adventure beckoned far from routine,
passive acceptance of circumstances,
relationships at a distance.
What is love?
Stoic in search of belonging,
masking emotions,I have lived my life
unseen for who I am- even by me.
Work is/was my fuel;short bursts of creativity
spoke loudly-
but the rules kept me safe, neutral.
Teflon coating, costumes, structures.

Retirement did not really burst the bubble
but provided space to explore…
my divided self.
Clean the closet: what costumes, roles to keep-
to let go of what no longer serves me.
What matters to me?
Unmasking is happening over time
as I discover the truth of who I am.
The conceal/reveal continuum adjusts-
inside and out.
Inner life matters;what has been waiting to be born?
Possibilities: creative energy-
writing, singing, dancing;music and words
are my keys.Play.Conversations with others-
creating anew, identity as we age, evolving lives.
Towards wholeness: being vulnerable,
Light and shadow colour my days.
Listening to messages from my interior-
my heart and soul have ideas,speak to me of self care.
My intuition thrives,
My life is unfolding; I am enough.

Others have said:

.when we are strong enough to know who we are-
we will remove the mask
.masks: a callous between my heart and the world.

My life as a chameleon continues!

Advertisement